Resentment Is A Signal, Not A Sin

Most people hate resentment.
They think it means something’s wrong with them.

It doesn’t.
It means something’s off.

Resentment shows up when you say yes but don’t define the terms.
You think you’re being generous. You’re actually being unclear.

That was me a few years ago.
Our oldest moved out. We agreed to help him financially for a while.
It felt right until it didn’t.

After a few months, I started to feel irritated.
Not at him. Just off.

So I checked my thinking.
I realized I never decided how long the help would last or what would tell me it was time to stop.

That’s what over-givers do. We skip clarity to avoid discomfort.
We’d rather feel resentment later than awkward now.

Once we talked it out, set boundaries, and agreed to revisit — relief.
Resentment gone. Connection back.

Here’s the truth:
Resentment isn’t about them.
It’s about you being out of alignment.

It’s not a flaw.
It’s feedback.
A red flag that says: Get clear.

Try this:
If you’re feeling resentful today, ask yourself:

“What did I say yes to without defining the terms?”

Then fix that.

Want to go deeper?
The ACE Assessment helps you see exactly where your confidence gets tangled, where you over-give, under-communicate, or lose alignment.

Start with the Authentic Confidence Assessment: https://www.bethoughtly.com/ace-assessment

It includes a one hour review with me where we unpack your results and design your plan to strengthen your confidence.

Believing in you,
Allison